I am so angry. This week I hopped on the scale to see that I had gained pretty much all of the weight I had lost back. Seriously?? After all of this time? What was the point of any of it if I’m back at this? My BMI was back up by a full point, and my muscle was down. I started to do my … Continue reading I Need to Calm Down: Weight Loss Angry Day
Last week, I spent too much of our grocery budget. I was sick of not having snacks to eat or to give our toddlers. As any mom knows, all toddlers want to eat are snacks, all day long, every day, and it gets really old cooking a new meal every five minutes just for it to get thrown on the floor and crushed. Plus, I’m … Continue reading When Every Choice Feels Like Life or Death: Dave Ramsey with a Small Shovel
Ever since I grew to adulthood, I hear the echoes of everyone who told me, “That’s not real. That’s a fantasy.” Most of the time, I silence them With a wave of the hand, And maybe a deep breath, But then, Sometimes, a wave of grief comes, My heart begins to ask, “Were they right? Does God give us dreams to take them away? Does … Continue reading Jaded
My entire life I have struggled with the Crucifixion. I could never wrap my mind around God allowing His Son to go through something like that. To be honest, I don’t see that fully going away anytime soon, the problem of evil is my biggest hang up in life, and even when I find an answer to satisfy me for a bit, there’s still this … Continue reading The Beauty of the Crucifixion
Lately, I have been feeling like a ping pong ball in my own head. I’m learning a lot about a lot of things, but the problem is they all seem to contradict each other. I am learning how to cultivate joy, but I am also learning how to give myself space to be sad, I am learning about how to let good things in, and … Continue reading Ugly Cry, or, My Awakening: The Tension Between Cultivating Joy and Feeling Heard
Lately, I keep finding things that people say are rules or how things should be that are hard for me because I have walls up because of things that have happened to me. I learned this because I read a blog post about giving God our pain, and as I have been offering up my hurt to Him, God has repeatedly comforted me, and then … Continue reading Walls: Start with Love
“Reading 1 Acts 15:22-31 The Apostles and presbyters, in agreement with the whole Church, decided to choose representatives and to send them to Antioch with Paul and Barnabas. The ones chosen were Judas, who was called Barsabbas, and Silas, leaders among the brothers. This is the letter delivered by them: “The Apostles and the presbyters, your brothers, to the brothers in Antioch, Syria, and Cilicia … Continue reading Acts 15: Christians Chill Out and Love
Tonight, my newsfeed is full of anger and sadness. Pain is manifesting all over the internet in 100 ways, from the women whose hearts are breaking over the children dying, to the women who see their own lives being torn away in front of them. There are screenshots being shared in all of my groups of what other people have said accompanied by comments about … Continue reading The Abortion Bills
*title by Patrick O’Donnell The hard thing, the impossible thing, about God, or really I guess about a true relationship with God, is that He is not physically present in the way that our other relationships are. The philosophical question as my husband phrased it is, “Is it even possible to have a relationship with someone who is not accountable to us? Is it possible … Continue reading “The Elusive Nature of God”
This Easter was a hard one for me so far. On Friday, I saw a headline out of the corner of my eye, “When Easter feels like Good Friday.” I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. As I crawled through lent this year, my refrain was, Easter is almost here, Easter is almost here. Now that it was here it was … Continue reading A Good Friday Style Easter
