For Gaza 🖤

My heart aches.

I don’t know about you, but Gaza is like a really dark cloud, that I can pretend doesn’t exist and is not that big of a deal, but it is. I know it is and you know it is.

The horrific deaths I have seen on the internet. We have seen-if you are on that app too. Videos of a girl who should be partying on the beach right now, letting us know what unchecked violence looks like.

And we do nothing.

Less than nothing.

We watch, and most of us say nothing at all.

There is a special kind of cruelty to watching mass m**** in silence.

I don’t say that to chide you.

So am I.

I say it because they are right when they say we have to do something, and I am right when I say I don’t know what to do.

Brave young men tried to stop a ship, and I’m a mom fighting depression isolated in my house all day.

I can write my reps and they can throw each message in the garbage, they won’t use money from the government for the starving children here, how could we believe that they would do anything for children there? They already have made their excuses I’m sure.

Writing the President helps a little with the feelings of powerlessness, but you know I bet he throws it away too. I thought about requesting a greeting for each child who died, over 5000 names, but my dishes hadn’t been done in a week and the laundry is piling up from our broken washer; and the kids have to have clean clothes for school.

The cognitive dissonance of fighting the despair in my brain to clean the house every day and try to make my social media irresistible so we can survive capitalism, feels insurmountable.

And we have GOT to do something.

But my broken heart is fighting despair that 5000 children are already dead, so what is the point? (I have to be careful or I’ll slip into *what is the point of anything if 5000 children can be m*****?* I don’t come back from that easily.)

Don’t you go that way either. This world needs us to stay conscious. Those of us who have a heart cannot give up now, even though it feels impossible to stay awake.

They said in the Barbie movie that recognizing the cognitive dissonance helps us fight it. I pray to God that that is true, because sharing my broken brain feels worthless.

Peace to you and to all you love,

Me